One of the most impressive thing about comic artists is their ability to draw identifiable characters. Being able to draw characters that actually remain looking like themselves throughout numerous drawings is an enviable skill; it's more than a matter of giving them unique hairdos or clothing styles, too, their faces are actually recognizable.
Where did this come from? My pitiful attempts to draw a single character with different facial expressions. I knew I was in trouble when I couldn't even draw a second set of eyes (on a separate face, obviously) in a similar style. Even though I've tried off and on for several years to create a character, it's an accomplishment that has ever eluded me. My frustration with my inability has especially grown since I started reading online comics; I see what they're able to do but know that even if I have a story to tell, it won't turn into a comic when I can't draw a character more than once; constantly seeing the talent of others has made me intolerant of my own lack. Even artists whose art seems less refined than my own admittedly rough drawings possess something that I've always sought: a unique style.
Perhaps I practiced by copying others for too long, so that I never learned to develop my own style, yet even after literally years of trying to define my own artistic style, I haven't been able to do so. It's a frustration that gains and loses importance in my life, but never really goes away. Right now it's at the forefront of my mind because an online comic artist whom I admire wrote, in response to an email that I wrote to him in praise of his work, that I wasn't a bad artist and should consider making a comic of my own. Well, that caused me to recall a long shelved story idea for a comic and encouraged me to try out some sketches of the would-be main characters. You can probably tell that the attempt did is not working out to my satisfaction and that this entry is a result of my irritation with my self.
I know it's pathetic to be whining so much, and that I should just keep plugging away at it until I come up with something that I'm satisfied with, but I guess I haven't learned to accept my imperfections well enough yet. Ironically, even though I'd consider myself something of a perfectionist, I'd rather write off my inability to draw consistently totally than to work at it until my art meets my own standards. Or maybe it's not so surprising considering that I'm also lazy. Yes, I know. How I manage to be the oxymoronic combination of perfectionist and lazy is beyond me as well.
